Tuesday, April 10, 2007


(Click to enlarge picture)

You know, I've always wondered who to call when I needed to install my new groin vault.

Droverstock 2007 Art Contest

These are from the [see title].

This one is the winner in my book, combining the work of Salvador Dali, Van Gogh, Munch, and...somebody else. That's right, you don't spend two years at an arts college and not pick up a little art history.

These are my three runners-up.

This is Dr. Wacky-Waving-Inflatable-Arms-Flailing-Tube-Man, professional art critic.

Saturday, April 7, 2007

The Easter Miracle, From the Book of Fish Candool

And yea, it came to pass that after three days, the small stone tomb which had long lain silent, stirred with the activity of new life.

The roughly hewn block of granite covering the entrance, once thought immovable, stirred amidst its dusty surroundings. The stirring became movement, and the movement became a great heaving motion which cast the stone far from the tomb's entrance, allowing the light of day to once again grace the figure within.

"Jesus, that thing is heavy!" he shouted, nearly falling to the ground with exhaustion. Moments later, while patting the rest of the sand from his white fur, the small rabbit looked back at the tomb. "You could've helped me, you know."

Jesus stepped forward into the daylight, frowning at his wrinkled robe, "Oh wait," he replied sarcastically, "which one of us had been dead for three days? and all they gave me was this lousy shroud...who's turin anyway? It's like a motel 6 in there. I died for their sins, you know."

"I know, you've told me a million times. Aren't you supposed to be meek?"

Jesus shrugged, "Yeah, I guess," and suddenly an idea struck, "Hey, we should make a holiday out of this, you know, like we did with my birthday, and we'll call it Christ-something..."

"No way man," the bunny interjected, "You get all of the good days named after you,"

"No, I named Lent after Lenny the disciple--"

"Only because he was stoned to death that day," the bunny corrected.

The Christ sighed and sat on a nearby rock to fix his sandals, "So what, you want me to name it after you? What kind of a name is Easter for a holiday? It won't go over at all with the PR department."

"Aw come on man, I haven't even been mentioned in the Bible yet, not once, and all because your precious PR department thinks that a talking rabbit disciple is 'too creepy for the younger demographic'. I deserve this much, do it and I'll shut up for the rest of the day."

"Alright, fine. But don't blame me when the focus groups bomb"

"Don't worry about that, the kids will love it. I'm gonna hide eggs."

And so it came to pass that each year on the anniversary of this day there was to be much mirth, and much money spent on merchandise, and many royalties were had by all.

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Physics is Phunny

Pearls Before Swine, sophisticated humor.